OK, the story. So here’s some more nonsense for the day…
I went out to run a few errands and decided to stop off at the Jamba Juice for a drink. I wound up driving behind this cop for a good mile or so. He decides to make a sudden turn with no warning, no blinker and causing me to have to hit the brakes. Of course I’m pissed, screaming about what a douchebag he is cause he can’t seem to follow his own laws, etc. Well he flies through this parking lot and darts out now behind me as I’m pulling into the shopping center. I’m like really fucker; I got your number come and get it!!! I park my car look back giving him the evil eye as he creeps by and I walk inside the Jamba Juice. This asshole decides to drive around then fly up to the store with his spotlight blazing into the inside and decides now he’s not done stalking my ass, so he and his lil partner in crime are now gonna come in the store. Oh yea? Well I had it. I know what’s up cause my ass wasn’t born yesterday and these fools are barking up the wrong damn tree.
These lil “cops” come walking in, looking about 20 years old, fresh rooks out of school and barely out of their pull-up diapers when the one with a smug look on his face was ready to rumble. I take one look at that fool and said to him “Ya know you might wanna learn how to use your blinker officer before you get someone killed”. At this point I was half joking around and that’s when the lil shit wanted to battle. IT WAS ON LIKE DONKEY KONG! He starts getting mouthy with me, telling me that I was speeding and tailgating him which was completely NEGATIVE. He was trying to act like he had some just cause and telling me he was gonna pull me over (of course he didn’t cause assbag had no cause) so I proceeded to tell him off while his partner smartly shut his mouth and people in the Jamba Juice were stunned.
I basically came out of my face with a twisted smirk and let him have it. I told him maybe he needed to learn how to do his job, I had his “number”, and when he told me I could call in a complaint if I had one, I told him I’d gladly buzz his sup seeing as we know the same people and since I’ve been around longer than he’d been alive, he might wanna watch where he’s steppin. After I threw a few more insults his way and wondered if I was getting ready to get arrested he decided he wasn’t gonna win this battle and was done looking stupid so he left! Hahaha I couldn’t believe it. So, I got a stupid grin on my face and said “Have a good night officer… fuckin rookies.”
By far one of the funniest nights and of course a lil crazy too; had me on edge for a lil bit I won’t lie, but overall it all worked out and it was a good story to share with everyone. Before I left the store I told everyone that ‘you can’t let these mutha fuckers get away with murder’, lol. I took one for the team and for mankind tonight, so on that note; fight the power.
© 12/22/12 Renee Lopez
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